Thursday, January 26, 2006

Schimmelism Of The Week XXXVII

R' Kahn: What would you do if you saw R' Moshe [Feinstein] in the field picking fruit?
Roth: I'd say, "Holy heck! It's techiyas hameisim! (resurection of the dead)"

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Truly Heart Stopping

I in no way wish bad to him, and I hope he has a refu'ah shleimah (full recovery), but this is just funny and waaay too much (and we all know how much I love sports):

Fan had heart attack seconds after Bettis fumble

Talk about a heart-stopping game between the Pittsburgh Steelers and Indianapolis Colts.

Terry O'Neill, 50, of Pittsburgh, was watching the game at a bar and had a heart attack seconds after Jerome Bettis fumbled trying to score from the 2-yard line late in the fourth quarter. Quarterback Ben Roethlisberger prevented the Colts' Nick Harper from returning the recovered ball for a touchdown and the Steelers hung on for a 21-18 win.

"I wasn't upset that the Steelers might lose," he said. "I was upset because I didn't want to see him end his career like that. A guy like that deserves better. I guess it was a little too much for me to handle."

"Too much to handle..." You don't say....?

Schimmelism Of The Week XXXVI

Tonny: Why don't you eat Lubavitch meat, Rabbi?
Rabbi: To get to the other side.

Kibbutz Galiyyos, Here It Is

2. IsraelĀ“s Jewish Population Surpasses United States
By Ezra HaLevi

For the first time, Israel has more Jews than the US, according to Hebrew University Prof. Sergio Della Pergola. Tel Aviv has also overtaken New York as the city with the largest Jewish population...


Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Eizeh Chamud!

Ok, this is what's going down: ALL of you will go RIGHT NOW (if you know what's good for you...) to either my brother's, or sis-in-law's to see the cuteness possessed by my nephew.

Well, what are you waiting for??

Monday, January 09, 2006

Schimmelism Of The Week XXXV

Max: I'm not on the ball today.
Tonny: No one is Max. The ball is bouncing all by itself.
Danny: Where is this so-called ball everyone talks about?

Roth: I feel that rebbe goes home and cries because we're so stupid.
R Kahn: No, I laugh, but for the same reason.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Happy Birthday

Happy birthday Ima! :-)

"...A Little Dreidel, I Made It Out Of Clay..."

Seriously though, why would anyone in their right mind (or left for that matter) make a dreidel out of clay? Wouldn't it be like, I don't know, hard to use or something? I just don't see it working very well...

Monday, January 02, 2006

Yeah 9000 Hits!

Thank y'all...Keep 'em coming folks.

The Yanks Do It Again

I wanted to post this back around December 23, but I didn't have time to write it all, and I saved it as a draft, and just totally forgot about it. Well, here is it:

Yup, they think they get another top free agent, Johnny Damon for 4 years, $52 million. Great pick up, right? Well, here's my prediction:

He might be good for a little of the time he is on the Yankees. Maybe. But overall, he qill be quite bad, and in the 1 1/2 - 2 1/2 year range (maybe 3 years also) the Yankees will trade him to the Mets. Either he will be back to his oldself (really really good leadoff hitter), or really really bad.

Obviously those are the either/ors, but like, think about it: He could be really good, because he'd be leaving the Yankees. But then he could also be really bad because he'd be coming to the Mets. He'd be around 35, 36 then, and he'd be old and washed up (I hope not, but you know), and of course even all non-washed up players the Mets get are bad (well, not all, but a LOT, like Burnitz, Alomar to name a few), so Johnny would be too.

We'll just have to wait and see, won't we...?

Schimmelism Of The Week XXXIV

Tonny: Rabbi, my ears were killing me Motza'ei Shabbos, like they were literally sticking knives into themselves and my brain.
Rabbi W: You say that like it really happened, you meant to say figuratively.
Tonny: No no, like they actually took knives and stuck them into themselves and my brain.
Max: Sticking knives into Tonny's ear is one of my hobbies.