Friday, July 29, 2005

The Pope & His Yami

I was watching M*A*S*H before (best show ever), and one of the commercials was for "Pope," a new original movie from the Hallmark channel. As with most previews, they have different shots of the movie, with narration in behind, and one of the shots was a shot of the back of JP II's head, putting on his "yami," and I had a strange/weird/funny (whatever word you want--put in your own if you want) thought:

How awesome would it be if the Pope wore his yami on the front of his head and not the back...?

Yeah 5000 Hits!

Thank you everybody--or should I say Ed for pressing refresh a bill--er, I mean 5000 times...?

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Since Jesus, Eh?

Ima was driving me home from work, and at one point, there was a car in front of us, with a bumper sticker that said:

*cross here* O R T H O D O X Y
We've been telling the truth
since 33 ad.

I want to make a bumper sticker that says:

*Magen Dovid here* J U D A I S M
We've been telling the truth
since the world was created.

Or at least, 1312 bc, when we got the Torah at Har Sinai (do that math if you want). Whatever, you get my drift...

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

"We Love You!"

Let me tell you, it feels really good to hear that--from whoever it is.
Last night we went to Kosher Express (the new chinese place in New Haven) for Reni's birthday. Good food, I must say. Their duck was really good. It was fun too, Ed came....yes Ed, the special sauce is brown...Oh gosh....:

Abba: Excuse me, what's the special sauce?
Waiter: The brown sauce.

Ed and I were DYING, and we couldn't stop laughing. We were gone. Laughing for at least 5 minutes. BH I stopped when it was time for me to order. Ed's father came around the parking lot again, so we went out to say hi (he was in their van) and Ed's tells him the story, so he gets to, and his father asked what's the brown sauce? Can you guess what he said? So by now even in retelling it, we're both DYING, and his father goes, "Oh s***..." and then I start laughing even more, and Ed says, the brown sauce. Oh...good times Ed, good times.
Hehe, Krispy Beef....
Then Kronik came in with Lapidus and some other dude. That was cool.
After that, we went to Wal*mart, got some stuff (I got another cool fire tie--Peggy paid for it so I wouldn't wear the dragon one again. Hehe). When we were leaving, we went to our car, and we were right next to this nice African American family. We were talking a little, Peggy said something about switching cars with them--they had a new suv. They asked how was I, I think, and I said, God Bless (instead of BH), and they go, oh, we're pastors from Nigeria. And I say, well, we're Jewish. And the lady just like, goes nuts like Oh my God we love you! Shalom, nice to meet you, and she shook my hand and Abbas hand. She was sooooo excited to meet us, it was nice. I said to her, it was nice that to be reminded that not everyone hates us.

And it really is. You get all this Jew-hater stuff from, uh, everywhere, you think no one likes us. Arabs STILL killing us, Tony Blair blaming the attacks on Israel (surprise surprise...), Arabs STILL killing us, you'd think, is anyone with us anymore? America is, but like, I don't know, for some reason I don't trust America as much as I used to anymore. But fine, anyone else? Are we all alone now? World vs. Israel?

Apparently not. Nigeria still loves us.

"Oh my God, we love you!"

Always feels good to hear that from a stranger...

Thank You Lord.

Friday, July 22, 2005

How About It?

I wasn't at the motel today. When I got to the motel, Mr Macy was on the phone, and I heard him say, "...yeah he's right here..." He hung up and said to me, you'll be working at the shul tomorrow, Jeff (the 2nd custodian dude at shul) quit. I say to him, "Aight, that's cool--it works out because I wouldn't have had a ride here tomorrow."
One of the things I had to do today was clean the bathrooms--both of them (and I was quite surprised when I didn't see any couch in the women's bathroom, let me tell you...). While I was cleaning the women's bathroom, a question popped in my head. I asked myself, "Would it be unethical or unmoral to, while cleaning the women's bathroom, use if I need to?" I've been grappling with that question for a few hours now, and haven't been able to come up with an answer. On one hand, hey, it's a bathroom, just use it you fool. On the other, but it's the women's bathroom, you know?

So what do you think?

Ani Oheiv Yehudim


"I love Jews."


Please God, Guard My...Mouth??

I was davening Mincha before and when I got to E-lokai Netzor, I started thinking about what I was saying: "E-lokai netzor lishoni meira, usifasai medabeir mirma vago'--My God, guard my toungue from evil, and my lips from speaking deceitfully etc."


We actually ask Him to guard us from lashon hara.

How many of us realize what we're saying? How many of us just go through davening like a robot, not thinking about what we're saying (notice how I say "us," I do it too...)? We actually ask Him, please, let us not speak lashon hara.


If only we knew what we were saying...

Sunday, July 17, 2005

Let's Get Retarded High - Black Eyed Peas

About Time...

A few days ago I saw one of those anti-drugs commercials. However this one was different. There was a statue of someone throwing a biscus, and the narrator was saying, "Steroids break you down, ever so slowly..." It was the first anti-steroids commercial I have seen steered towards kids.
About time...

Thursday, July 14, 2005


Stupid American League...

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

All Star Game Update

Middle 2 NL 0 - AL 0

In the bottom of the 1st, Manny Ramirez was up with men on 1st and 3rd with 1 out, and Manny, who is 6th on the all-time ab/rbi list, hit into a double play.

I don't know, that's just funny to me.


It's amazing how, these are the stupidest things ever, yet, so addictive...

which pirates of the Carribean character are you?

Captain Jack Sparrow

sexy drunken pirate

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Work Work Work

I started work yesterday at Joe Macy's inn. So far I've been painting a fence. 7 and a 1/2 hours of painting for two straight days...BHYY that I like singing, or else I would have gone crazy. 15 hours of loneliness, up and down with the paint brush, over and over again. Up and down, up and down. I was thinking of doing it the way Mr Miyagi told Danielson to do it in Karate Kid I, but then decided against it, figuring it would be faster not that way. 15 hours, and I'm still not done...but tomorrow iyH beH ba"h I will finish. More lonliness with the paint brush.

BHYY I like singing...

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Oh...I Mean Oy

Why does the Yeshivishe Velt pronounce the "o" sound like it's "oi?" I mean, Chassidim, so they pronounce things different because that's how they believe the vowel is pronouced, they really think (and, you know, are possibly right. Who knows these days?) that a kamatz, which we pronouce as "a" (as is as Yisrael), is pronounced as "u," and that a kubutz is really pronouced as "i" (as in Yisrael), etc etc. If they're going to go like the Chassidim, go all the way. You can't pick and choose.

Or am I missing something here??

Monday, July 11, 2005

"CNN Will Print Anything"

"CNN Will Print Anything"
by Divrei Moshe

No better way to put it, DM...

Friday, July 08, 2005

Boston, Middah K'neged Middah

Boston was lots of fun. Saw Batman Begins with Gila. Good movie, good movie. Christian Bale, who played Jack from Newsies pays Batman, and he's quite good. The fight scenes were a little bit annoying, because they couldn't (or didn't want to) keep the camera straight (at least that's what it seemed like), but it was a good movie.
Fireworks were really really nice too. Better than last years...
The mornings I spent at the kollel. Tuesday I was there all day until around 500, 530. Wednesday I was there only until 100, when I walked in the pouring rain to Rami's for lunch with Devorah. I must say, Rami's shwarma is probably better than at Golan Heights. It's really really good. Thank you for lunch, DAC. Then I went to DAC's apartment for a little bit, then I called Ayelet, she picked me up, we went shopping a little bit, then went back to her house, she cleaned her room, burned me some cd's, I just layed around keeping her company. It was cool because I haven't really talked or really chilled with Ayelet for like, 2 years, but now I did, so it's cool. Then she drove me to Craig's house, but no one was home, which was annoying because I wanted to drop off my tefillin and sfarim, and whatever else I wanted to do. Whatever, wasn't so bad. Went to Taam China with Gila--their Steak Kew is really good. Thursday I was there til 145 about, went to the T, but it didn't come for a long time, and by the time I got to South Station...I had missed my 315 bus, so I just chilled. It was fun.
I miss Boston. And not just one person, Dani, I like the city of Boston, I really do.

HaShem always pays you back for your actions. Always.

On the bus to Boston, our first stop was Foxwoods (or Mohegan Sun, then Foxwoods? Whatever...) and the bus was PACKED. So I sat next to a dude, nice guy. Then he asked me to borrow my phone for a second. I didn't really want to, I was kind of nervous, even though he was right next to me, and there were 55 people on the bus, so he probably wouldn't try anything, but still I was nervous to say yes, but I did anyway. Whatever, so he called his friend, something about picking him up. He used it, left a message, a few minutes the guy called back, I just gave him the phone. He thanked me, I was like it's ok don't worry about it. So I was relieved. I was thinking, why would HaShem do something like that when I'm trying to do something nice? That eased me a bit though, so that was good. So he got off, then I slept, learned, said Tehillim, nice bus ride.
I wasn't able to charge my phone at Craig's house, because he had no outlets available in his room, so I charged it at the kollel, in the chadar ochel (they didn't call it that though). Yesterday though, I charged it for around 3 hours, and it wasn't done yet, I was disappointed. I just said, "Lord, please let me have enough battery to get home." So I left, hung out in Boston, yada yada, my battery goes down to 2 bars [of 3]. At around 900, I call Miriam, because I haven't talked to her in a while, didn't see her :-( when I was in Boston, so whatever, I called her. We were talking, Gila calls, she says go to talk to her then her back. Ok. I talk to Gila for a minute, say I'll call you back. So I call Miriam, we're talking, then she says, one of her friends from camp called her on someone's phone, so she's going to call her, and call me back. Ok. I notice now that my battery is down to 1. I'm talking to Gila, and as we're aying goodbye, my phone turns off. I'm thinking, Oh gosh, "Low Battery..." When that happens, that means that there is only enough power for it to be on for a little bit--not even to make a call. But my bus was going to be late getting into B-port, and I had to call A & P--they left a voicemail too. I had no choice, but to borrow someone's phone. I looked around, I noticed the guy across from me had a phone. I was nervous to ask him, but I had to reach A & P, so I asked him. I asked, can I borrow your phone? My battery is dead... and he gives it to me, and I thank him. I check my voicemail, called Peggy, it was good. I gave the phone back to the guy, and I realized, wow, I love you Lord. Middah K'neged Middah. Just like I had let someone use my phone when he needed it, someone let me use it when I needed it.

The Lord is THE MAN!!
Have a Good Shabbos y'all.